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| Is it ok to still feel trepidation when XAH calls? |
| XAH hasn't called me at work in months, not since I got the caller ID and refused to answer him (and since he never leaves messages, it works out well). Our interaction is limited to short 3 word... XAH hasn't called me at work in months, not since I got the caller ID and refused to answer him (and since he never leaves messages, it works out well). Our interaction is limited to short 3 word texts prior to his visitation with DD, short polite conversations during the exchange, and that's it.
In the last 5 weeks, XAH hasn't taken DD for his midweek visit, stating various excuses such as "It's snowing too hard", "I have a new job and didn't change my schedule" or "You didn't ask me nice enough". Last week-end, he shortened his visit with DD so he could go bowling.
I was *feeling* him disengage from DD and from the conflict, which is why I felt a lot of trepidation when I saw his number appear on my caller ID at work today. I didn't answer. No message was left. No email or text was sent. So nothing happened. He might have just been calling to ask me for something...
But I STILL felt my heart pound and my breath catch in my throat and I HATE THAT! I want to be easy going and chill about any interaction with him, as I have been for a while now. It's so much easier and peaceful for me.
I wonder when I'll get to that "bend like a reed in the wind" state of mind when it comes to XAH...
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| Dispointing Others |
| I have a hard time making decisions. I am so worried about doing the right thing or hurting peoples feelings. That's what I like about this forum, I can get other peoples input. It always helps.
... I have a hard time making decisions. I am so worried about doing the right thing or hurting peoples feelings. That's what I like about this forum, I can get other peoples input. It always helps.
Buy here is my dilemma. I want to go to a OA meeting. I am pretty shy. I called the head person and went to the extreme of talking to him. I told him that I would come. A couple of days ago I felt hopeless and I needed to talk. But know I feel strong and really don't need it.
I do not really want to go but I think I should just because I said I would. But I do not plan to go on a consistence basis
I do like the idea of this meeting and it will come in handy. When I get stressed it will greatly help out.
But I only get that stressed about 3 or 4 times a year.
This is a step meeting so I do not know if it is a good idea to the the leader of the meeting the truth.
any thoughts
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| Maybe it's time to get back in my hula hoop? |
| I think that my RABF took one of my sleeping meds, but I'm not completely sure. Of course, he denies it. They didn't work for me, so I had to return the remaining pills to the pharmacy to get new... I think that my RABF took one of my sleeping meds, but I'm not completely sure. Of course, he denies it. They didn't work for me, so I had to return the remaining pills to the pharmacy to get new meds. There was at least one less pill than there should have been. He got pretty angry about me asking him about the med. His anger makes me think that he was caught in a lie. That's often how he acts when he's been found out.
It annoys me, because it seems to be some of the old behavior. However, in general he seems to be doing pretty well. He is back to work, and has an old (sober) friend coming to visit in a couple of weeks. He's still meeting with his psych. So, my point is, maybe I just need to worry about my own stuff and not think about this ridiculous one pill.
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| Mexico: Juarez Plants Hurt More by Recession Than Drug Violence |
| El Paso Times, 07 Mar 2010 - JUAREZ PLANTS HURT MORE BY RECESSION THAN DRUG VIOLENCE EL PASO -- The drug war in Juarez has prompted an estimated 10,000 small businesses to close or move across the border to Texas. But it has not slowed Juarez's biggest economic engine -- the maquiladoras, or manufacturing plants, largely operated by international corporations. |
| Mexico: Caring for the Drug War Victims |
| El Paso Times, 07 Mar 2010 - Juarez Physician Helps When Others Refuse JUAREZ -- Dr. Arturo Valenzuela Zorrilla fills a void left by two years of violence committed by warring drug cartels. The secretary of the surgery specialist summons him one day to the General Hospital in the deadliest city in Mexico. Gunmen had hit a man with three bullets, one to the neck and two to the torso. |
| US HI: Program Pays Addicts to Use Birth Control |
| Honolulu Star-Bulletin, 10 Mar 2010 - Project Prevention Brings Its Contraception-Sterilization Message to Hawaii Addicts Mona Rodarte watched state authorities take away her third baby a few months ago, and the trauma was enough to motivate her to consider Project Prevention's offer to pay her $300 to get sterilized or start using long-term birth control. |
| US HI: Editorial: Marijuana Shops? Wowie, What a Bad Idea |
| Honolulu Advertiser, 10 Mar 2010 - As if this state wasn't swimming in a sea of troubles already, some lawmakers are seriously contemplating various strategies for loosening state curbs on marijuana use, beyond the current allowances for medical purposes. Have none of them been paying attention to what has happened in other communities once this particular Pandora's box has been opened? |
| US: 31 Women on List of Drug Smugglers Sought by DEA and FBI |
| El Paso Times, 09 Mar 2010 - EL PASO -- Thirty-one female drug smugglers are among the fugitives being sought by the DEA and FBI in U.S. border states. They are among 385 people in border regions wanted by the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration. Federal agents described five of the women as "armed and dangerous." |
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